Finding Forrest: What if?

I am guilty of this, but it's something I wish to correct.

When working with others on a project, I am finding that it annoys me when people make suggestions by asking "What if we tried it this way?" I realize they are only making a suggestion, but when others ask in that manner, I feel compelled to answer. Being a person that has a knack for details, more often than not people don't like my response. It's not that I don't like their idea, it's just that I quickly evaluate the idea because the question prompted me to. Most of the time when someone asks that question, it seems they are looking for positive reinforcement.

The question suggests that people are not really sure about their idea, but it's rare when that is actually the case. People use that question as a lead to present their ideas so they don't seem overbearing or forceful, but often they are very passionate about their idea to begin with. I've noticed the question usually sets up a "me vs you" conversation because people mistakenly ask that question to make a suggestion. The problem is that it's not actually a suggestion because it's still a question. There are those, however, who are sincerely looking for an evaluation of the idea rather than actually making a suggestion.

If you have a suggestion, make it clear. When you suggest an idea, say "I suggest doing this because.... Now, how can we improve on this idea?" It makes you sound confident but at the same time realizing there is room for improvement while also inviting others to take ownership of the idea.

Also, remember that feedback is part of the process. Don't make a suggestion if you're not prepared to hear how bad it could be. Get over your ego.

1 comments:

Troy StaufferOct 14, 2009 12:27 PM
You sound like you belong on this side of the wall (development instead of marketing). The primary reason for bringing up an idea over here is to see if it withstands the scrutiny of all the other high C personality developers. If it survives, it's worth looking into.

The best part is that this particular group doesn't take it personally if their idea is shot full of holes before it barely even leaves their mouth. It's part of the process of achieving excellence, so if someone else has a better idea or has thought of a negative that you didn't consider, we'd rather get it out now and discuss it to ensure we come up with the best possible solution. No ego is allowed, or at least would be very happy, over here. That's not to say marketers are egotistical. :)

One problem I've noticed in the last few years is that it is easy to take this same process home with you without thinking about it. When your wife is just wanting to think out loud or vent to you, it's not particularly helpful to jump into web developer mode and immediately point out the flaws in her logic. Fail.